Miss Paige <3 / Chelsey Stockdale (Friend Forever )Read >>
Miss Paige <3 / Chelsey Stockdale (Friend Forever )
Hello there Miss Paige. =]
Sorry its taken me foreeverrr to write you, i have been so busy with school lately its pretty much pre-occupied all of my time. I talk to your mom pretty often now and I',m actually doing a little something for her, which I'm sure you already know about. I bet your wanting to yell at me for some of the pictures of you that is going into it, ha.
Your 19th birthday is coming up pretty soon and I still cant believe you wont be here for it. My birthday is Wed and im coming in to go to dinner with my family but I am going to stop by and see you. I havent even had a chance to do that in a long time and im sorry.
I was talking to my mom the other day in the car and of course you and Amanda got brought up, as usual. I couldn't believe it is almost the one year of losing Amanda and then I said I couldn't believe it was almost 2 years for losing you. It has flown by but then again, it hasn't. Its been a LONNGG two years yes, but it does feel like forever since I've seen your face or heard your voice. It still seems like yesterday I got that horrible call from Katie Smith telling me you were gone. Thats one memory I can't get out of my head and one that replays its self over and over.
Losing you was one of the hardest things I have ever done and will ever do in my life. I will never forget you or how amazing you were, inside and out. Your memory will live on forever. I continue to look forward to the day I get to see that smile and peace sign.
Hey Paige..Just wanted to say Hi..I wanted to give you this poem I found..I'm making candles for Amandas one year and this is one of the poems I am putting on them..
Taken From Me
I'm sitting here in my room, looking at your picture..Wondering why you couldn't be part of my future..Uncontrollable tears stream down my face..While my heart beat starts to race..Asking god why he took you from my life, It was more painful than stabbing me in the heart with a knife..I still need you here, You were the one to make everything so clear..You are apart of me and I am apart of you..When you died a part of me died too..I never knew how hard it was to loose someone you love until the day you went to heaven above..Even though I can't see, I know you're up there watching over me..I miss you more and more everyday and all I can do is pray..In my heart you shall forever stay....
thinking of you / Liza Price (friend)
i know that it has been a long time since i have been on here im sorry for that. i still think about you every day though and it still hasnt gotten any easier to accept the fact that you were taken away from us. i went to one of your sisters basketball games about a month ago.. the last home one and seeing her play made me think of you so much. it made me think of our seventh grade year and how much we hated doing all those darn suicides that crago just loved having us do. and it made me think of you and cylee running around depantsing everyone at practice. i love seeing your sister she makes me think of you so much and it makes it a little easier to deal with.. its hard when everyone comes in for break and we all see each other out. i keep wanting to see your face btu i know that i just cant anymore. its just not fair. everyone misses you so much. and i dont think you ever had any idea how much of an impact you would have on everyone lives when you left. nor do i think God did or i dont think he ever would of been able to take you away from us. everythings been a little tough lately and its even harder to think that yet another one of your birthdays is coming up and you wont be here to celebrate it. i wish so much that i could just see you again. just one more time. theres so much that i would say. i really miss you paige. everyone really misses you. i guess they werent kidding when they said that it wouldnt get any easier to deal with. everyone still needs you to continue looking out for them and keeping us all safe. i love you paige marie. Close
Paige../ Alexa Smith (friend)
Wish you would of been there for the games, I will tell you one thing though, Sierra is one of a kind and she definatley has some of your attitude in her haha..But I just wanted to tell you to keep watching over her she is a great kid and has so much more ahead of her you should be proud! We all miss you, and you will always be in our hearts! Close
Dream*/ Nancy (Friend)
Paige, the dream I had about you last night was sooo incredibly real. I was sitting in a living room with you and your mom, and me and your mom both knew how strange it was that you were sitting with us talking. And you were so happy to be with her. You had permission from god to visit with your mom for a couple hours. And your mom kept telling you that you had to go back to heaven because your visiting time was just about over. And you just wanted to stay and keep talking of course. And your mom simply said " it's ok Paige, we'll talk tomorrow". If only it was that simple. You were so beautiful and happy.. And you were talking about a lot but the only thing I can remember you saying was when your mom starting crying and you said " I know you can't always see me but seriously trust me, I'm always around". And I woke up. Thanks for the dream and send some to your mom. I know she could use them. Goodnight angel <3 Close
Wow!! Wish you had been at Sierra's tournament game tonight. You would have cracked up! There was a girl on the other team pushing, elbowing you name it. One time she shoved Sierra in the back hard and the ball wasn't even in play yet. Sierra turned around and threw her arms up and said, "we aren't even playing yet". At the end of the game we were up by 1 and Coach told Sierra to get on that girl and get in her face. Well....she did. lol The girl shoved Sierra twice and then Sierra shoved her back. The girl punched Sierra in the jaw and Sierra punched her in the stomach. Then they both were swinging. lol They called a technical on the other girl. It was bad but I was thinking about it tonight after the game and started laughing thinking of what you would have said to her. I can hear it just as if you are standing here saying it. "Dude, you should have punched that girl in the face!" You would have been so pumped. What made it even better was we beat them by 3! It was a crazy game. You would have loved it.
I was having flashbacks of the game that you played against Buckeye and that girl was scratching you and pushing you around and I stood up and yelled, "Paige, don't let her push you around!" Coach pulled you out and talked to you and then sent you back in. You walked out on the court looked at me and started throwing your head back and forth like you were cracking your neck getting ready for a fight. It was so funny. Then you started letting her have it and then the ref put a stop to it.
Sierra is her own person and totally different from you but....sometimes I think she acts just like you. lol The little smart lines that she says and attitude about things. She says the same funny lines that you used to say all of the time. I guess she learned from the best.
She really needs her big sister right now! Stay close to her!
to an angel / Terri Littleton
I didn't know Paige personally, but I've heard her story and check back at this site often. I met Amanda's mom and aunt at a football game and donated to the scholarship funds. I light a candle for Paige and Amanda every Sunday at my church, and also one's for their mothers. I recently lost my nephew, and can't image the pain these two families must feel.
Both girls definately have a beautiful place in Heaven. I pray regularly for both families, but especially their mothers to have peace. Being a mom myself I can't imagine experiencing such a loss.
May you be at peace and know that I will continue lighting your candles and keeping you all in my prayers.
God's Blessings to your family,
Terri Littleton Close
Ugh..its been a while since i have wrote on here. That doesnt mean im not thinking about you though...because I think about you every singe day. I actually have 2 pictures of you infront of me right now on my desk. I miss you.. everybody misses you.. it doesnt really get any easier as time goes on. Danielle and i talk about you a lot. It makes me feel better when we do cause then i start thinking about all the crazy times and it brings a smile to my face. We were just talking aout junior prom today..lol good times.. What actually brought me to your site today was an assignment for english..eww i know..i wish we could be back in mrs. zirillos again.lol But, i have to write a paper about something significant that happened in my life and that affected me in a big way. And i have decided I am going to write about you. I never thought anything like this would happen to me..that one of my good friends would pass away.. and i know its bad to say..but it really makes you realize how precious life is and not to take it for granted. I know you lived your life to the fullest and truely enjoyed what life had to offer. Thank you for opening up my eyes Paige Marie..i only wish you could still be with us today..Please watch over us.
Hi Paige..We really didn't know each other. Your dad and my mom are cousins. I went to the calling hours that they had for you..This is all just so sad..First you then Amanda..I really don't know how your mom and your Aunt Bev are making it through these horrible days. I can't imagin the pain..
I think it is so nice that your mom is doing so much to keep your memory alive..Yours and Amandas memorial sites are so amazing..I looked at all your pictures. You really looked like a fun,loving beautiful person.I wish we would of known each other. I hope you are helping your mom get through live without you. I'm sure she needs to feel you there with her..I can't even understand all this..Why does god take the ones he does..My grandma always told me your not supposed to question gods doings..But I'm sure everyone is wanting to know the answer to that..
At least your not alone up there..I just wish all this could be different..I hate to see people I know or even people that I don't know, have to go through something so tragic..You and Amanda keep letting everyone know that you are with them..Give your mom the warmth of your wings holding her tight every night..I'm sure ending every day without you is hard. But starting a new day has to be even harder..You are a beautiful angel Paige...
My deepest condolences to the family through this rough live without Paige..Keeping her spirit alive and not forgetting her is what she would want..And Dana you are doing a really good job at that..I bet loosing a child is so much worse on the mother than the father..I'm sure she is happy for all everyone has done for her..I'm sending my love to you and your whole family..You are always in my thoughts and prayers..
Hey Kid....I Came back to school last night from christmas break....Seeing everyone at logans and stuff made me think of you alot...I got to see Mitch nearly everyday!... We talked to you mom at the basketball game...she was happy to see us..Now that I'm back, I've had a rough couple days...I miss my friends so much...I wish you would just show up at my room one day and ask me to go back to high school with everyone....just like the good old days...I have alot of friends here...but they don't know me like my Jon Boy and Mitch...Today's my Birthday too!!!! : ) the big 19 now...I just wanted to let you know that I still think about you everyday...This new college thing is getting to me right now...but i know that you'll help me through it....Keep us all safe Paige...We Miss You...
Well another horrible 17th is here. This is worse than ever because I can't get into the cemetery. I haven't been able to go there since Monday it is now Saturday. This is awful! I feel a connection with you there. A closeness that I can't get anywhere else. This is the first 17th that I haven't been able to go there.
Miggie keeps telling me that you aren't there anyway and that you know that it has been snowing alot and that is why I can't get in there. I told her that I knew that but I still like to go there.
I hate this so much! I hate that your gone. I hate that I can't talk to you. I hate that I can't smell your hair or look into your eyes and talk to you. Now I can't even get into the cemetery. This all really stinks!
Everything has changed so much since you were stolen away from me! That is exactly what I feel like too. God stole you away! I'm still very angry with him!
I'm going to the BL/EL girls and boys basketball game on Friday to sell the Paige items and raffle off the EL/BL quilt that Theresa Stockdale made. You should be going there. Not me to sell your scholarship items.
Please stay close and send me signs. How about another dream? It has been a long time. Dreams are my only way of holding you and talking to you now.
Found Balloon / Bett Beeson (None)
My husband was walking our dog around our field when he found a bit of green balloon with lavender ribbon and your pink tag a little before the holidays. We live on a farm northeast of Pittsburgh in Indiana Township and about 40 minutes from Children's Hospital where our own lovely daughter passed away in l985. We have been where you are and wish you much peace and comfort in the days ahead. Hang in there. Hugs to all of you from a friend in Pittsburgh. Close
Thinking of u Dana and family and praying you all have a peaceful New Year filled with many sweet memories of Paige as I know you all will!! I'll be thinking of you as I always do!!
Our Precious Angels / Terri♥Mom To Angel Brent Bowden
Dear Desarro family,
My thoughts and prayers are with you all as we go through these difficult holidays without our precious angels. Hard to find any reason to celebrate without them but we will honor on their memories and continue to celebrate their lives until we meet them again. Our beautiful angels are probally busy getting ready for a grand party in heaven with all the angels. Many hugs to your family and hope you have a safe and peaceful New Year. Love, Terri Proud Mom to angel Brent Bowden
It's Christmas day, of course the kids had a good one with sooo many presents. Our Christmas has changed since you left us, I am having a very hard time with this, like your mom, it is harder for me this year. Christmas Eve... cooking, exchanging presents, going to cemetary to light your tree and then dinner. Lighting your tree has become the most important part for me. I can't shop for you, talk to you, laugh with you, hug you, the only thing I can do is decorate your grave and light the tree and it makes me so mad, it is so wrong!!!!
I look at your pictures and think how would you have changed, the pictures we have are the only ones we will ever have.
Well it is Christmas. Rich & I just got finished putting out the kids presents. We had our gift exchange with Miggie, Pappy, Aunt Traci, Uncle Eric & Karlee on Christmas Eve like always. Once again this year there was a huge void. It is so wrong that you are not here with us.
You always had your dry sense of humor to make us all laugh. I really need that right now. I was thinking about you being mad about something on the way to school with Miggie and you telling her about Santa Claus in 4th grade. lol Miggie didn't know what to say to you.
I was telling someone about your last Christmas with us and we thought we really pulled one over on you and bought you and Sierra laptops. I was so happy because it had been a few years since you were really surprised. I had them delivered to Aunt Traci's house so that you wouldn't see them and the UPS driver delivered them there when you were babysitting Karlee. You had to sign for them. Of course the box had a picture of it and had my name on it. You called me and said, "Dude, how about I'm getting a laptop for Christmas!" I told you that you weren't and you said, "Mom, I'm not stupid there is a picture on the box." I was sooo mad.
Then for your last birthday I went into K-mart to get your prescription filled because you were sick and I left you in the truck. I decided to go ahead and buy your camera because I knew that you wouldn't come in. You never did! I'm paying for it and turn around and there you were. You said, "That is definitely for me." Once again I was busted. lol I just gave it to you then. You only had that camera for two months and I have always been so thankful that you had it. You had taken 123 pictures on it. So many memories that I wouldn't have of you. That was the best present that I could have given you. I only wish that I had done it before then. I treasure every picture that I have of you now! That and memories are all I have left of you.
I wish that I could go back and change everything. If only........ If I had known that I wasn't ever going to see you again I would have taken videos and pictures of you everyday. Pictures of your hands, your feet.....I miss the smell of your hair and your soft skin. I wish you were here! Life is so unfair.
This year has been so much harder for me. Last year I was so numb and running in auto pilot. This year has been such a chore doing anything to get ready for Christmas. The tree, shopping, baking, wrapping. Thank God for Rich. He has done almost all of it. (except for the shopping and baking of course)
Your place at the cemetery looks beautiful. Your tree is lit and can be seen from Rt 170. So many pretty things there.
18 months ago today, I said goodbye to you. It was the hardest day of my life. I remember everything ( I mean everything ) from that whole week in the hospital. The whole 4 hr curve everyday. I have never experienced so many emotions at one time in my life. Every 4 hrs the doctors had something new ( some good, and then right back to terrible) . You fought so hard, kid. This is so unfair. I miss you so much. I know I don't talk about this stuff to alot of people, but it kills me inside to know that you're gone.
I hate the fact that your little sister and brother don't have you to lean on. They are doing so well, but I know that deep down they are hurting so bad. We've all been through some counseling sessions, and I guess they help a little bit. But there isn't a thing that can take the pain away.
So here it is another Christmas without you, and altough I am excited for Sierra and Shane, I know that there is going to be a huge void left for you. Instead of buying you presents, we're buying ornamental things for your grave. There is something that is not right about that!!!
I know that everyone says that you're in a better place now, but I think you're place is here with us!!!!!
I miss you kid, more than anyone will ever know. I know that you'll be around us on Christmas day, but please show us in someway.
Tributes and Condolences
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